Submission

As we begin this morning, I want to share with you a true story from my life that I don’t think I’ve shared with many of you, if any of you, before.

It was 1600 hours in very late December, and all the natural light was fading from the evening sky. I had left my squad with one other man, and as a team of two we were on a recon mission in hostile territory. We were making our way through the natural obstacles of the terrain when we heard the sounds of conflict. We quickly located the source of the sound – hand to hand combat with three people involved. Mixed in with the clutter of the terrain I could see that other people were watching from a distance, but were not engaged. I knew that we had to do something. So I sent my battle buddy on a sweeping move to the far side of the conflict. When I could see he was in place, a stepped out of my cover, and into the fray.

Seriously! I had gone to Madison a couple of years ago to pick up Andrew for Christmas break. It was December 23. He needed to do some last minute shopping, so we went to the mall and looked for a couple of gifts. As we were leaving, walking to our car, we heard screams. We ran over to the area, and saw a car, half in a spot, and half out. Off to one side stood a man, who had two women engaging him in a fight. He had one of the women by the hair. And was fighting the other off with his other hand. It was like the man had kicked over a beehive! There were fists flying, screams and foul names scorching the air – Oh, did I mention that the man was white, and the women black? That just added to the tension, and the name calling.

I could see that there were other people watching from around the lot between cars – but no one was doing anything, and there wasn’t a police car in sight, so Andrew and I stepped in to try to break it up. We tried to get everyone to calm down. I tried to convince the guy to let go of the woman’s hair – but it was the only control he felt he had in an out of control situation. It just seemed to continue to escalate, when I saw the one woman go the trunk of her car and open it – I yelled out to Andrew, “Watch out! She might be getting a weapon!” And she was – a tire iron! Before I could do anything, she ran up to the guy and hit him on the arm and shoulder with a tire iron. But he wouldn’t let go.

I was telling the woman with the tire iron that she didn’t want her little kids seeing her behave like this – put the tire iron down. She did. I don’t know how it happened, but somehow I was able to convince the guy that this was not going to end until he made the first move and let go of the woman’s hair. There was simply no way for it to stop unless someone made the first move. He did – and she punched him square in the face as soon as he let go! But once he let go of her, they backed off, and got in their car. He picked up his bags that were laying at his feet and started walking to his vehicle, which was down the aisle a ways, and Andrew and I walked to our car. Then we saw a police car sitting in the lot just two rows from where we had been! He had no idea what had been going on!

The really crazy thing is, that four weeks later, when I was taking him back to school, Andrew needed to get a military hair cut, so we stopped at the same mall – and guess what – another fight was going on…we just kept walking!

In the past three months, there have four arrests made in Milwaukee over what is being called “Parking Lot Rage.” In some, but not all the cases, a person will go and stand in an empty spot while the driver of the car makes their way to the spot – while other people in their car, who want the same spot, try to force their way in by driving in to the empty spot, pushing the pedestrian aside. You can imagine the results – people have been cut, punched, bruised and had teeth knocked out – over a parking place! Isn’t it strange that we will pay thousands of dollars to go to a building and run five miles on a treadmill or ride for hours on a bicycle that is attached to the floor, but we will fight tooth and nail over a parking spot that is 40 feet closer to the door of the Piggly Wiggly!

If you take the time to really analyze each of those issues, and dig deep into the root cause of each one, you will find that it all stems from a single human condition – selfishness.

Look again at that list…do not each of those festering sores on our culture stem from that common source? Sure they do!

This morning, as we continue to look at “Developing the Spiritual Disciplines” in our lives, we change gears. Up to this point, we have focused primarily on disciplines that are internal and personal in their focus – disciplines like meditation, prayer, fasting, study, simplicity and silence. Those are things that we do ourselves, by ourselves6. With out talk today, we begin to study disciplines that involve and affect others – submitting to one another, serving one another, confessing to one another, seeking guidance from each other, and worshiping together.

For those of you who might be new to this study of ours, let me just mention that we have determined that Spiritual Disciplines are important because they are the steps that only I must take in my life that allow God to do what He desires to do in my life. The disciplines are the habits and practices that I engage in that allow God to produce a level of maturity and growth in my spirit that I can’t gain on my own. The disciplines don’t create change – God gives change – the disciplines simply prepare me to receive the growth that only He can give. Only God can change a human heart

Many people in the church feel frustrated in their spiritual lives – it just hasn’t been at all what they expected. The joy, peace, patience and goodness that they hear and read about hasn’t been the hallmark of their existence, and they wonder why. Or they slip into a melancholy resignation of Christian mediocrity all the while with a nagging sense that they’re missing out on something…

They are! And the way to experience that missing part is through the liberation that comes through the application of the Spiritual Disciplines. Now at first, that might seem kind of ironic – “I find liberation through disciplines?” Yes. Consider the person who sits at a piano and can improvise and create beautiful music. That freedom to compose and improvise only came after years of discipline – practicing scales, rehearsing fingering patterns, hours of committed effort. It is exactly that discipline and regimented routine that leads them to the joy and freedom of creativity.

But not everyone gets to that point. Sometimes people get tired of the discipline and stop before the freedom is found. Others are so focused on the disciplines that they become “laws” that can’t be broken, and they miss the freedom that could be theirs.

The same is true spiritually. We’ve been looking at spiritual disciplines that are meant to bring liberation and freedom to us as believers, but that incredible joy will only be known if we keep at them – and if we keep our eyes on the goal – to draw near to Christ and to be more like Him. I can get so focused on any one of these disciplines, or all of them, and become so “religious” that I am of no use to God any longer! That’s what happens to way too many of us! That’s what happened to the religious people of Jesus’ day – they were so religious that they were arrogant and prideful. They became offensive to God.

But if I keep my eyes on Christ, and strive to be real, like He was – then the practices of these disciplines will cause me to be a “magnet” to the lost – drawing others to Him. I become a light in the darkness – and my life begins to reflect the character of Jesus – and people see my good works, and glorify my Father who is in heaven. That is the goal of these disciplines.

Today we look at the freedom and joy that comes from submission. “Freedom…from submission? Are you kidding?” No – Submission gives us the amazing freedom that comes when we give up the burden of always needing to get our own way.[i] I propose to you today that all the evils we listed earlier would be eliminated from our lives if we learned and practiced this single discipline. But even more to the point, each one of our lives would be more joyful if we learned to submit.

When we submit to others, we let go of the demand that things go the way we want them to go. So many of us spend weeks, months or years in anger or depression because something in our lives didn’t go the way we wanted it to. We focus on it, we are in a perpetual rage over it – it’s the undercurrent of our lives. But the discipline of submission allows us to release that disappointment and get over it. Most of the things that happen to us are not nearly as important as we think they are. Even the worst scenarios in our lives aren’t nearly as bad as they become when we compound them with resistance, anger, and bitterness. One person will lose a child – perhaps the worst scenario any of us can imagine, and they rise above it by submitting to the sovereignty of God – that He is in control and we are not. They submit to His will and let go – while another carries the anger and bitterness of that loss to their own dying day – and the loss, which is heavy enough alone, is compounded by their refusal to let go.

The Bible gives us a formula for finding freedom from the bondage of self. It is found in the teaching and the example of Christ. His words echo the theme over and over – “If anyone strikes you on the right cheek, offer him the left also. If someone demands your coat, offer him your shirt, too. If someone forces you to carry a package a mile, offer to do a second mile.” “Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you.” “He who would be the greatest among you must be the servant of all.”

His actions mirrored His words: “If I, your Lord and Master, have washed your feet, you, too should serve one another.” “Not my will, Father, but Yours’ be done.” “He emptied Himself, and took on the form of a servant.”

In Matthew, chapter 16, Jesus said these words, “If anyone would come after me, he must deny himself and take up his cross and follow me…” This verse is the linchpin for our understanding of submission. Submission is self-denial, instead of self-promotion. When I submit, I give up my demands that things go my way – whether those demands are made to God, my spouse, or the person in the mall parking lot.

We have a tendency to misunderstand, or misrepresent what self-denial looks like. We tend to push it as groveling or self-hatred. We equate it with perpetual sadness and self-contempt. “If it makes me happy, it must be wrong. If I like it, I can’t allow myself to have it, after all, I’m supposed to be miserable!”

But that’s not what Jesus is talking about! Jesus didn’t hate life – He was full of life! Self-denial is not self-hatred. Self-hatred is when we convince ourselves that we have no value – self denial recognizes that we have amazing value – God loves us and cares for us individually, and has our best in mind and allows us to submit to His will. When we do that, we can put our demands and requirements aside and freely and joyfully yield to others! We give up our spot in the parking lot gladly! We give up our demand that things go according to our plan.

Even the setting of Jesus’ words show this – Jesus had just been telling the disciples that when they got to Jerusalem, He was going to be arrested by the Jews, turned over to the Romans, and killed. That was not on Peter’s agenda, so he pulled Jesus aside, and said, “Not so, Lord! I won’t let them do that to You!” Jesus said, “Get behind me, Satan!”

WE are not in control – we do not set the agenda – we do not determine what God will and will not do! HE does. IF we are going to be a disciple of Jesus – a follower of God, then guess what? We are supposed to be FOLLOWING, not standing in front of God telling Him what He should or should not do.

We are to live in submission to Him – deny our selves, and follow Him – not try to think for even and instant that WE are the leader…

Self-denial is about an attitude of the heart. I can “give in” to others without submitting. I can obey, but still be rebelling inwardly. I can outwardly submit to things not going my way, but inside have a spirit of martyrdom and walk around all day saying “Poor me! I didn’t get what I wanted!” That is not submission as Christ demonstrated it and taught it. Submission means that I genuinely let go of those demands – I don’t let it bother me that I didn’t get my way – it’s just gone – it’s OK! And THAT’s where the freedom comes in – man, it is so liberating to be free from the burden of always having to get my own way!

Well, I never said it was easy – after all, these are called spiritual disciplines, not spiritual coincidences. “Ooops! I accidentally became submissive! Isn’t that cool!”

If we want to develop this discipline – and, brothers and sisters, what a difference this could make in our lives and our church! – We need to practice, and work at it. Here are a few practical steps to take to help us develop submission in our lives:

You will begin to discover the incredible joy that comes from placing others’ needs ahead of your own – and the freedom that comes when you demand what’s coming to you.

It’s counter-intuitive. To some of us, none of this makes any sense at all – we’re holding so tightly to what’s ours – what’s due us. You may not be ready to take on this challenge. But for some of us – the Holy Spirit is working on your heart right now, and you know this is for you. Pray about it – read the verses and outside resources listed on your study sheet – and submit to the leading of God in your life. You will discover amazing joy and liberation!

Submission

Opening